St. Patrick’s Day Parade and Celebrations (CPs Sat., 3/15/14)

1) There’s no doubt about what the number one pick is today—the St. Patrick’s Day Parade in Downtown Pittsburgh. Billed as the second largest St. Patrick’s Day Parade in the country, it will have over 23,000 marchers including bandsIrish organizations, “Miss Smiling Irish Eyes,” and every politician on the planet. Almost 200,000 people will be in town to enjoy the parade and festivities. The route proceeds from the intersection of Liberty Ave. and 11th St. along Grant St., then turns right onto the Boulevard of the Allies, where it will pass the parade reviewing stand at Allies and Stanwix St., ending at Commonwealth Place. Remember, anyone who wants to be Irish is Irish on St. Paddy’s Day! Parade begins at 10 a.m. Downtown.

2) During the parade, Market Square will host a family-friendly Fair in The Square. Family events and activities include live music, face painting for children, street performers, and other fun play from 10 a.m.- 1 p.m. Post-parade (officially starting at 2 p.m.) there will be a more adult-oriented focus including green beer and street vendors from neighborhood bars and restaurants, with a chance to dance away the rest of the day at a free concert. Market Square, Downtown.

3) St. Patrick’s Day is a  time to have a taste of Ireland’s native waters (GuinnessHarp, and Murphy’s brews are some good ones, as are Tullamore Dew and Jameson Irish Whiskies). Have an old Irish toast (such as “May you be in heaven a full half hour before the devil knows you’re dead”) in any of several happenin’ Irish pubs including Mullaney’s Harp & FiddleMcArdle’sMurphy’s Tap Room or Claddagh.  For those who don’t imbibe or are designated drivers (thank you!), enjoy a McDonald’s Shamrock Shake, a soft drink or a cup o’ hot tea.

4) After they’re done marching in the St. Patrick’s Day Parade, Callán will continue the Celtic carousing at Jergel’s. Not content just to gig at pubs, the five members of Callán have recorded two albums of their takes on Irish standards. Led by vocalist/multi-instrumentalist Sheila Liming (also of the local rock band The Armadillos), they are sure to please those who want to keep the St. Paddy’s Day fun going into the afternoon and beyond. 3 p.m. 103 Slade Ln., Warrendale.

5) An Irish band with a reputation as solid as that of the Bastard Bearded Irishmen can get booked anywhere this week, but luckily for us, they are staying close to home and taking to the Rex Theater today. The Irishmen are currently one of the most celebrated bands in the region, snagging festival spots and getting mentions in national publications. They are even rougher than Irish punk forerunners like The Pogues and Flogging Molly: Their sound is a pungent, never-relenting assault of brisk guitar riffs and lyrics about getting dead drunk. Chrome Moses and Johnny and the Applestompers open. 7 p.m. 1602 E. Carson St., South Side.

6) The fact that there is a tribute band to Pearl Jam might make some feel old, but face it: The days when Pearl Jam was the raging embodiment of youth were long ago. The local Ten: A Tribute to Pearl Jam honors the legacy of the Gen X standard-bearers by playing the band’s ’90s-defining hits with precision and loudness. Until Pearl Jam itself swings by Consol again, you can’t find better men. Their show at Altar Bar tonight will be opened by There You Are. 9 p.m. 1620 Penn Ave., Strip District.

7) That honey badger YouTube video really got around a few years ago. Instead of deeming himself the Wolf or Tiger or Shark, local mixed martial arts fighter Dominic Mazzotta has taken “the Honey Badger” as his nickname, because (as we all know by now) that carnivorous little animal is ferociously brave and crazy. Tonight, in the main event of Stage AE’s Gladiators of The Cage, Mazzotta is taking on Cody “No Love” Garbrandt, who is thus far undefeated in his professional career—but the Honey Badger doesn’t care! 6 p.m. 400 North Shore Dr., North Shore.